10 common questions people ask about Asexuality

1. What is asexuality? What does it mean whena person is Asexual?

These are a variety of situations where a person has no interest in sex, although there is still no unambiguous definition. Some consider it a state of sexual orientation, such as heterosexuality and homosexuality. There are many manifestations of the phenomenon; on the one hand, there are those who have no sexual desire at all, so they do not have sexual fantasies and they do not masturbate, while others will have fantasies and do masturabte. , However, due to the lack of sexual attraction there will bereluctance to have sex. These are not people of normal sexual desire who are consciously abstinent. Asexuality people do not have a problem, they simply do not want to experience sexual contact and this does not involve distress.

2. What is the scope of the phenomenon?

The phenomenon was first described in Alfred Kinsey's study some 50 years ago, during which he first rated the level of human sexuality according to their sexual orientation. He found there were those who had no connections or sexual reactions, which he called Group X and included about 1.5% of adult males. In another examination he conducted several years later, he described it in 3-4% of unmarried men and 14-19% of unmarried women. Since Kinsey's research, much more information has been gathered about the extent of the phenomenon, and so in a large-scale study conducted in Britain in the mid-1990's, where approximately 1.05% of respondents said they had never felt sexual attraction to another person.

3. Is it more typical of women or men?

According to Kinsey’s research and probably also from findings in the years since then, women are more likely to consider themselves asexual compare to men.

4. Which age group is more typical?

It is like asking which age group is more typical for homosexuality... There is no typical age group and probably when a person formulates his or her sexual identity, it continues to accompany him or her later in life. There are those who will form connections and even marry, but not because of sexual attraction or desire for romantic connection, but because of accepted social conventions, and thus Kinsey described in his study 1-2% asexual men who were previously married and 1-3% among women who were married.

5. Is A-sexuality a temporary or permanent sexual orientaion? Or is it a tendency that always exists but its expressions and intensity change? Depending on what?

As with the definition, this point has also been controversial, with some claiming to be a passing phenomenon. Today it is common to think that this is a fixed sexual orientation, which exists among a certain percentage of people and which does not change over time or due to sexual experiences, just like homosexuality or heterosexuality.

6. What are the causes of asexuality?

This issue is also controversial, as among the factors may be an environmental, innate or physiological source. The common opinion is that this is an innate tendency, but there is no definitive evidence.

7. What are the characteristics of asexuality?

There may be different characteristics as I have described in the definition and just as the definition is inconclusive, so are the variety of characteristics, such as those who do not experience sexual attraction at all; Those without sexual urges; those who do not rank sexual in a high-ranking place and "do not understand" why everyone is passionate about sex and occupation around this issue; Some do experience sexual urge, but not at a level that will make them realize it.

8. When does asexuality become a problem and it is clear that help is needed? Who should be contacted?

There is a problem when it causes mental distress, and then it is recommended to seek help from a sexual therapist with a mental health background. The distress usually does not stem from the fact that the person does not have sexual desire, but because he / she feels abnormal compared to the cultural norm and the environment in which he / she lives.

9. Is it possible to have a romantic relationship with an asexual partner?

Certainly. Asexual people do not want sex, but that does not mean they do not have feelings. Like children. Some of them need friendships and relationships and therefore, will want emotional (not sexual) relationships. Romance is not an introduction to sex for them. Some experience physical attraction, but without the desire to have sexual contact. And so - in the age of the internet, it is easy to find suitable spouses.

10. Are there any treatments for the problem?

Answer in Question 8. Asexuality is not defined as a problem or disorder, but as a tendency like homosexuality. Those who come to my clinic are mostly those who feel distressed by the feeling of anomalies compared to the prevailing social norm around them. Today, the number of applicants has diminished due to information and assistance in online forums.

Prof. Rafi Heruti, an expert in rehabilitative medicine and a certified sex- therapist.

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